There is a song, that immediately ties with one of my fondest memories. Late into fall, Bare trees, air cold enough just to see my breath by the street light's dim aura at 6:00am. Absolutely no cars because the old bridge was torn down. I don't remember anything else from that day. What I was wearing, day of the week. anything. But I don't ever want to forget it.
It doesn't hurt me.
You wanna feel how it feels?
You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?
You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?
You be running up that hill
You and me be running up that hill
And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
If I only could, oh...
You don't want to hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.
There is thunder in our hearts, baby.
So much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?
You, be running up that hill
You and me, be running up that hill
You and me won't be unhappy.
Running Up That Hill - Placebo
Today was exhausting, and I'm not anticipating any change of pace until Saturday night. I have my Ipod back now and plan on doing some serious changes with it. But we'll see. I need to find someone with a mac that I can use so I don't lose everything currently on there. Also I'm a bit farther in Parable of the Sower. I'm really getting into it, which I think is great because it's been too long since I've really read something. Two things happened today.I remembered 1. why I dislike showing people my art or my own created something or another. And 2. Im begining to dislike fitting into social standards more and more. Not sure where that will take me, but Im starting to thrive on the second glances from these people in the hallways at school and anywhere else. Thinking they have any idea as to who I may be, What I am capable of. They don't know me, I am a mystery because I dont wear mini-skirts and flip-flops. My life is difficult at times because i think so much. I am slowly coming about this sort of total happiness though. I think from a few different things collected (Art, friendships, and..one person imparticular). I feel, liberated. And new. I can feel the changes in my life, turning again. Must be Spring.
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